BLACK ACID
Black Acid is the darkness eating you.
From the inside.
When you are not watching.
It is you.
It is your fear you are running from.
It is your pain you chained deep down inside.
It is the poison you cannot resist.
It is you.
It is me.
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BLACK ACID is live dark ambient noise multilayer macro-micro post-archeology project from Nina Pixel. Digging deep into her own memories, uncovering the layers of forgotten pains, pointing light to the dark corners of emotional abysses, Nina is building her own archeological collection of her inner world as a reflection on the world outside “us”.
Nina has been exploring humans as the phenomenon, recording talks, poems, diary notes, bodies, expressions, thoughts and layering it with the “research” material collected everywhere where she goes.
BLACK ACID is the research of the Emotional Intelligence aspect as the special unique mythica power of humans - an object of her long term plannetary study.
WORKS>>
CONTRA TIMORE:
Fear. We are born into it. Sometimes from it and mostly we live with it. Fear is protection but also a huge blocker. Imagine the world without fear, your relationships, yoursel
Bez strachu sme vsetci kamosi Bez strachu nikomu nic nevycitas Bez strachu sebe nic nevycitas Bez strachu mozes normalne zomriet a nic sa nestane Bez strachu je vsetko uplna pohodicka.
/Recorded in Prague @ Nowhere in particular : with Nina Pixel, Ōtone, cplt and more / We’re heading somewhere but nowhere in particular
RELEASE ON>> BANDCAMP
NINA PIXEL live at Punctum from Punctum on Vimeo.
ALL ALGORITHMS OPENED on https://www.punctum.czIt is a sonic poem. The choreography for the "dance on the edge of paradox", trying to capture an ephemeral feeling of the immersion into the invisible field of the reality we try to understand of the same order of complexity as the symbolic meaning we deploy.Bias Loop is the poem for the funeral of Self.
Perception entails the recognition of the sensed and selected sensum as the appearance of the physical object existing in the external world. Physical objects are not given as primary data. What is given is only a set of sensa and a sensum is something non-referential. In other words, if we speak about physical objects, sounds or our perception of the world, the sensum as such is a patch of attributes - colors, noises, descriptions having no reference to a given object. The external object makes its appearance only when we have discriminatively selected the sensum. It is our mind which interprets the sensum as the appearance of objects out in space. (Aldoux Huxley - The Art of Seeing)
WHEN NOTHING IS CERTAIN ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE
Bias loop is not real. Nothing is real. Nothing exists. Our lives are our own projections of our own interpretations. Each break out is a realization. it is like pulling out the matrix cable for a second, seeing layers from above, although the loop will never stop. Are our realities a simple simulation of our Self as well as the simulation of the “safe space” within our circle? The circle of Pentacle 15.3 speakers is a metaphor - simulated spatial cognition - sound movement and distance is not “real”. The distance and position of the sound emitters are programmed, creating a virtual environment. How far is the reality? How far are our Selves?SEE THE DARKNESS THROUGH THE LIGHT
Our senses and mind are biased in the never-ending (?) loop. Living in the world of symbolical language, skewed realities, lies, fake news, propaganda, dreams. What has left to us living in the world without security, utopia, ignorance and uncertainty? We live in times of cold war volatility, unable to grasp anything but bias. Socially constructed topics are taking place of important issues. We are living in the time of personal micro confusion and a huge macro sociopolitical identity crisis.
HOW IS THAT FOR YOU NOT TO BELIEVE INTO ANYTHING?
Bias loop is not just a poem about searching the true Self. Looking into the eyes of uncomfortable truth via the light of darkness and stepping out of the comfort zone of inherited or learned bias loops. It is an appeal on the major blindness of all of us. The stop word. Society is breaking apart, relationships are breaking apart we are breaking apart. It is a normal part of any evolution. We are lucky to be here, to face it - we are lucky to be the ones who can face the monsters - stop running from them - turn around and say STOP. We are lucky to create a new order and new environments - we are lucky to program our realities and set the parameters of the sound we want to hear.
IT IS ELASTIC
IT IS THE SIMULATION and it is good. Because we can change it. Regardless of the level of our focus, we can program our own personal simulations and we can change the public spaces we live in. We are the person chasing us in our dreams, we are those monsters haunting causing our insomnias and sleep paralysis. Let’s stop. Breath deeply and talk to them.
We will never know what we are suppressing, avoiding or do not want to look at unless we stop and deal with it.
My monsters are ugly and I usually do not like ugly and uncomfortable things in my life. But it is part of it and it is a very valuable experience to be a friend with your rude, but clear speaking friends. Truth hurts and stinks. So we often try to close it deeply in the cellar. Chain it and never feed it so it starves. Deep down in our personal cellars - it does not die. It is getting stronger, living out of anger, sadness or any other strong energy we give to it anyway. Once we go down to take out some old ski equipment - our angry friend jumps on us and goes crazy in the most unexpected time (when we actually plan a ski trip or just a cook a diner).
Stepping out of our comfort zones, finding keys from the dark cellars full of monsters and inviting them for a cup of tea instead of running from them is the moment of stopping our biases. Having a personal monster as a friend is a great gift. It is a power - it is wisdom making us true and balanced. Reconnected.
YOU HAVE TO DIE
What will happen once we want to escape - glitch and distort our “Self” as a recorded program? The sound of organic cello strings, voices, noises from the streets, talks, animals, wind and nature are being transformed into a different level - new realities - malformed - biases - skewed and looped. Die as they were and are being recreated into the new. Does it really matter? Does it matter what is first and what follows? Do we really need a touch of secure “real” reality? Can we live in between layers of a constantly malformed world?
Self is a projection. Same as the XYZ scales we live in. Is it who we really are or who we really want to be? Destruction of our Selves, society and nature created a pattern. Constantly dying and being recreated again and again in the loop. How many time we have to die to realize we have never lived? We are going to be lost, running from our own awareness till we stop, turn around and look outside. When we decide to let go our ego - when we let our Self die, only then we are able to reconnect.
RECONNECT
Disconnect self and reconnect to oneness to the infinite - get out of the bias loop and connect to every other living thing - expand and reconnect with yourself. We can only appreciate life via death. Darkness via light and calm via uncertainty.
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Bias Loop is the poem for the funeral of Self
The composition was made especially for The Pentacle 15.3 sound system build in Steim studios by Fedde ten Berge and cooperation with Sonic Acts and Next - advanced music festival. Commissioned by Sonic Acts in collaboration with A4 – Space for Contemporary Culture. Part of Re-Imagine Europe, co-funded by the Creative Europe Programme of the European Union.
The system of 15 speakers reminds me 15 voices of coven watching us dealing with our own bias loops, circles as well known symbols of eternity and movement.
The inspiration came from my own bias loop I am recently trying to break out. Musically - randomising the sound - like it would like to jump out of the closed circle. Symbolically - with the will of stopping the loop, breaking it and looking into the eyes of true myself (bright and the dark sides, no matter what comes first).
I am inspired by travels into my own dreams, childhood, biased mind and wise soul. I am building layers of sounds representing thoughts, feelings and assumptions which we are daily dealing with. Choreography for this "dance on the edge of paradox" like would Bourdieu say is trying to capture an ephemeral feeling of the immersion into the truth, immediately disappearing within the own created realities. There is no clear objective truth. Just the subjective hallucination of the interpretation of our own realities.
Is there something like the unbiased language? Real me and real-time? Where am I? Who am I as a real unbiased me? Why am I here and what is my purpose? My first memories from this life inspired me to write and think about these questions. I remember the feeling I am not from here. Staring out of the window and feeling I am not from this planet, not from this time. I also knew, soon I will not be able to see the world and all its magic through the same lens I did that time. I knew it will come and it did. Now, many bias loops later, I am trying to come back. Find out more about this memory, feeling I had when I started to think about the meanings of our existence.
In the creation process, I am using recordings of daily objects, connected to the recent topic I am working on or the places I am recently living in. Used sounds are processed noises of streets, various machines, stones, water, fire, forests or places with a "magic meaning" and translated into the musical language. I do not consider myself as a musician - I am just using this way of creative expression to share something I call the sound poetry. Used recordings, samples or instruments are the material I am working with, not necessary in the way "they were made for".